I was born in in 1962 and believed it verbatim, after all my father said it was true and he had checked out other religions so it must be. I always doubted that I would survive Armageddon even though I was not really a bad person, just spiritually weak and did not have a pioneering spirit or even just a door to door spirit.
As I grew up, I still believed in Armageddon but did not think about whether other things were right or wrong, I just did what I had always done. I noticed problems such as lack of love in the cong and I always seemed to be on the outside looking in. In 1995, I visited Brooklyn Bethel. Something there just did not sit right with me although I had always wanted to go there. I did not regret spending a whole day of my time in the US at Bethel but the slacking off began after that.
My father, I think may have been having some doubts also. I can't ask him as he is deceased, but before he passed away, according to mum, he stopped reading the society's publications and read only the Bible and did only meeting prep from the WT, etc. He has been gone over 16 years now and I do know for sure that if he was still alive, he would be very interested in what I have been researching on this site and others. He would be very open to TTATT. In fact if he was resurrected like the people on the TV series, he would be absolutely shocked to know he has been dead 16 years.
i have learnt so much in the past 6 months. I had not been to a meeting since the memorial of 2013 but only began looking into it 6 months ago. A few things bothered me such as shunning D/F young ones, JW's only ones to survive Armageddon, uncaring attitudes of elders, Bethel bros, etc. The main thing that stopped me was the uncaring attitude towards the elderly, in particular my mother. Then I found out it was a widespread problem. Don't even start me on child abuse!
Sorry my rant is so long. I have, like so many others, put many years into the org, not so much as a pioneer but just in my everyday life, always thinking before I bought clothes, saving money for conventions, being separate from others at school and work. Now my life is much less of a burden. The Bible says that my yoke is kindly and my load is light. That was not the case in the JW's. Now I can buy more fashionable clothes, get a piercing if I want to. I still subconsciously think about what I should do then remind myself that I am free now.
